Private message to Pansy Parkinson

[alt_padma]

I'm glad I caught you at supper last night.

And that we talked to Bobolis and Pennifold so no one bothered about us being out on the late side.

It's weird, isn't it? I mean, what happened last year, that's the kind of thing that could have made us absolutely hate each other--well, not hate, but you know what I mean, not be able to be round one another about now. But instead it seems like no one else can really exactly understand about it. Well, anyway.

I reckon every owl in England was delivering Easter baskets to the Slytherin table this morning! Was that big basket from your mother or from Mr Malfoy? I guess it helps knowing he'll look after you, even if your mum is sort of...starting over. Or if it feels like that. I'm not so sure, though--what you said last night? I mean, parents can get sort of...wrapped up in their own lives, and forget about us up at school, but that doesn't mean they don't love us anyways. They just might not be the best at showing it.

And I think sometimes parents get embarrassed just like we do, when they get overwhelmed by stuff. Like--they're supposed to have the answers, aren't they? But if they don't, well, I think they feel, maybe not ashamed, but--well, you know how Corner gets when he knows he's got an assignment due and he hasn't really done it properly? And he's not happy with what he's got, but he just gets a block about how to fix it? So he sort of...gives up and just waffles until he has to turn in what he's got? I think parents maybe feel helpless the same way. Which is really not on, because they're parents, but I guess they're people too.

Anyway--all I wanted to say was that I'm sure your mum cares, deep down, even if she gets sorta carried away with her own projects and all.

By the way, did you mean what you said about Diggory? Only I think just about everyone thinks he's fit so he's rather got his choice, hasn't he? I don't know what you see in Baddock, but then, did you know I used to have a crush on Xi Chang? Sort of silly now, when I think about it. On the other hand, I don't blame you finding that Chadwick bloke well dashing. (Perks has it wrong, by the way, I don't know why she thought he was in 7th-year when we were firsties. He's even older than that!) I mean, it's hard enough keeping the interest of boys only a couple years older than us, and then they're like Page and want something improper. So I guess in a way it's easier to fancy someone who's completely impossible to get. But I hope next year there are some boys who manage to fall between utterly oblivious and far too interested.

Comments

[alt_pansy]

I get what you mean about how it's sort of like what happened would either be the sort of thing that pulls people apart or brings them together. Last year right before all this happened, we were at each other's throats, you know?

Maybe that's what's going on with your parents. It pulled them apart instead. But that doesn't mean it's going to be like that always, I mean, it's only been a year.

And you're right, my mum probably does have all sorts of stuff going on that I never see, I bet most parents do, really. And they make stupid mistakes and quarrel for no particularly good reason, and don't always make the best decisions. I used to think my mum was perfect, back when I was really young. Because she was always so glamourous and clever and threw the best parties. But I think part of growing up is learning that your parents are just people too.

And yeah, I can see how Xi Chang might be charming, he always seemed enough. Ptolemy... I don't know why, but I just like him. He's a bit overly thin, but he looks so sharp in dress robes, and when he smiles, his whole face changes. I mean when he really smiles. And I think that there's certainly no harm in looking, even if we've no chance at all, or they turn out to be different than expected like Page. You've got to admit, most of the fun in watching Quidditch is seeing fit boys in uniform showing off!

Oh, and I saw Frobisher today, and she looked absolutely miserable. Just sort of shuffling around and hardly paying attention to anything. It was so sad, I hope she gets better soon.

[alt_padma]

I dunno whether losing Sanji pulled them apart or just made them feel even less together than they already were, you know? Like...like they already did a lot separately, but then this happened and, well Haruman's basically on his own and we're at school, so there just wasn't a reason to pretend anymore. I think Mum thinks Dad's seeing some other woman at the WWN, but she either can't prove it or doesn't want to know.

I probably shouldn't say too much even though it's a private message. Once before someone's private stuff wound up making the papers. The Urquharts, remember?

I don't know as I fancy boys who are too thin. Not fatties, that's for sure, but I dunno, Ptolemy Baddock looks like he's always a meal short. And besides, I'm pretty sure he fancies Karoline Moon. So if you fancy him, just be sure you're not really going to do anything stupid like Derwent did during the play. I really can't imagine going spare over a boy like that, though, can you?

Oh, speaking of things like that, did you know that Bell has to look after Frobisher now? At all her meals and the like. She has to make sure she eats and then she has to make sure that Frobisher doesn't go and vom it all up. Lav and Parvati overheard Robins talking about it. At least, we think Bell's the one doing it. She may have begged off because of Page Quidditch, in which case it'll be Demelza, and she's not keen to do it at all. Well, you can imagine. I'd be well cross about it too.

It really is sad, though. Some girls will do nearly anything to lose weight.

I wonder if there's a way to keep someone doing what they're supposed to do, I mean, without having to watch them day and night? I mean, some kind of spell - not the Imperius, of course but something - that would help convince someone they need to eat, or if they're ill that they need to rest, or whatever. Seems like that would be well useful for Healers.

[alt_pansy]

I remember about Urquhart. That was well embarrassing. And yeah, I think that a lot of times people at school forget that even though it's not something other people at school can read, that there are people that can. Although after the trouble that one man got into after spreading gossip to the papers, I think that's not going to happen too often.

And Derwent was just mad. Like she'd taken some sort of love potion. I mean, I guess it's all well and good when both people feel that way, even though it's sort of gross sometimes to watch people make faces at one another and snog all the time, but when it's just one person that feels that way and the other one doesn't, it's just a giant mess.

It's not like he'd pay me much mind right now anyways, because I'm only a third year. And Karoline is pretty enough, and creative and all, and more, you know, developed. But I don't think I'd ever be that moony over anyone, even if I do think they're fit or something. It does seem rather silly. And it's not like that boy was going to leave Bundy for her after that spectacle.

It sounds awful to have to follow her around like that. Frobisher, I mean.

I don't know if there's a spell, but I can see how it'd go wrong. Like how the person would want to sleep or eat all the time, and when the spell ended, they'd go back to the same thing over again, because they hadn't changed how they really felt about it. I think the only way she'll start eating again is if she really actually wants to, only I don't know how she'd ever get that way.

[alt_padma]

What do you mean that people at school forget about people outside of school being able to read these? Have you heard about anyone getting in trouble or anything, over their private messages? Because I haven't, apart from people being all upset that Goyle lost his journal. But that's not the same thing.

I asked Haruman about that, whether Healers use spells to compel patients to do what they're told. He said it's completely unethical - that patients have to do what they're told because they know it's best for them, and that no Healer worthy of the title would force anyone to obey, even if it's in their best interests.

[alt_pansy]

That makes sense, what Haruman said, I mean. I'd bet he's a really ace Healer. He seems very confident, and like he likes his job, you know?

Well, it's sort of to do with Greg's journal, because at the party over hols, I heard Lucius's friends talking about how they thought that the traitors might've nicked other student journals, but might be pretending to write like students, and would be using codes and all to communicate. I sort of came up on them when they were talking about it because Arista Selwyn wanted to show her dad a bracelet she won.

And they mentioned they'd be looking at what we write in the Private Messages more, just to see if anyone is doing anything off -- I'd imagine it'd be like if someone started talking about a class they aren't enrolled in, or was using weird words over and over.

But it's not like anyone who was just using them for normal reasons would get into trouble or anything.